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As a coach, I have learned what it takes to find joy, create ease and achieve prosperity. I’ve personally taken these three steps and seen the positive impact in my life as well as the clients I serve.
It’s this simple:
- Gain clarity of purpose and vision and keep it in front of you,
- Have the right support behind you (and beside you, above you, and in front of you) and,
- Take focused and inspired action consistently!
You might be asking yourself “how” do I start? It begins with saying “yes” to investing in yourself as you walk the path of change. For this type of transformational journey, partnering with a coach is imperative if you’re really serious about creating amazing results that are lasting and sustainable. This was confirmed for me yesterday when one of my clients shared, “I matter” and “I am worth the investment.” This is the place where you learn to believe in yourself and have the ability to accomplish what’s necessary for steps 1-2-3.
Too often I see people “stop” when it gets difficult. You’ve probably found yourself here as well as you begin to doubt and question; before you know it you find yourself doing the same old thing and expecting different results.
The truth is when it matters you can expect opposition. Don’t take it as a sign to stop but as an opportunity to pause and assess so you know how to proceed based on intention, wisdom and discernment. Partnering with a coach will give you the ability so stay the course. In my opinion, coaching is the “circle of life” as it relates to achieving extraordinary results by following the 1-2-3 steps.
Are you taking action on steps 1-3 above? If not, start today because you matter and the world needs what you have to offer.
So, what’s your next step? What will you commit to to achieve amazing results starting now? Post your comments at the blog and share 1. what you’ll commit to and/or 2. how working with a coach has helped you achieve amazing results in your life!
“Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours.”–Ayn Rand
If you were to rate yourself on the level of joy you consistently experience, what number would you give yourself on a scale of 1-10? “1″ means no consistency and rarely finding joy, and “10″ means each and every day, I find joy in my life. Where do you find yourself today in relationship to joy?
In my work over the years as a professional coach, many people find joy based on what they are doing so it’s often an inconsistent and/or a fleeting experience. Why? Because our external circumstances are always changing and with this unpredictability it can be difficult to sustain joy.
But I want you to experience”joy” as your “inner” experience no matter what you are doing or what’s happening around you! You might be wondering, “Is that possible?” I say “Absolutely!” as long as you put attention and intention toward being “joy filled”.
I really appreciate what Becky Mason, Director of Marketing at Compass has to say about “joy”:
“Choose joy today. Right now, make a choice to receive joy and let it flow through you – not based on what’s going on around you, but based on the fact that you are loved and that you have a purpose that is bigger than yourself. We have no control over many of the things that happen to us, but we do have control over how we respond and how we think about those situations. You might think there is no way you can respond positively or joyfully to a particular circumstance. I am here to tell you that you can choose to allow joy to flow through you. We have control over one thing: our attitude. Life is 10% what happens to us and 90% how we respond.
A good friend of ours was diagnosed with cancer one year ago. After lots of chemo, radiation, surgery, pain and suffering, he received a clean bill of health. He said one thing recently that really stuck with me. He said, ‘I will not allow cancer to define me.’ His response to a circumstance he could not control was to choose joy. To find the joy in the situation. Our circumstances can be pretty ugly, but do you allow them to define you – or will you choose to rewrite your definition? Will you choose to respond with joy?”
After reading this, what will you choose?
If you need a little encouragement or some next steps, I have two immediate solutions for you that will cost you nothing but a little bit of your time:
- Listen to the first three days of the Compass MAP on the topic of “Find your Joy”. Visit my Compass website and click on the picture box that says “Find your Joy”. It takes you to the page of the MAP where you can access the first three days of audio recording (these are the ones in blue).
- Join me for a FREE Compass Group Coaching Call this Thursday, 12/15/11. I will facilitate the Compass Action System using the theme of “Celebrate Life”. For more information visit the event page at Facebook.
I know this is a busy time of year so you might decide you don’t have the time. But if not now, when?
It’s counter intuitive but it’s true that if you make the time to find your joy, you will experience it more often and consistently. So make the time…you’re worth it!
You’ve probably heard the phrase “stop shoulding on yourself.” Intellectually you get that should’s, have to’s and ought to’s just drain your energy and leave you feeling heavy and unfulfilled. Yet regardless of this knowledge you find yourself “shoulding” more often than not.
So what do you do? How do you change the cycle from “should” to “want”?
Let me paint the picture of what’s happening behind the scenes for me. I’ve been in an intense transition season, on a mission to reclaim my “want to’s” as I eliminate the “should’s” in my life. It’s literally impacting every facet of my life, including my work, my relationships with myself and others, and even basic things like how I schedule my time. As I go through this process, I’m amazed at what I’m learning.
I have allowed “should’s” to drive my life…often! Mostly because I didn’t realize that many behaviors and beliefs that drive me aren’t core to who I really am. Through my discovery , I’ve tapped into what’s true for me so I have stopped several things cold turkey, like writing my blog. I haven’t written a post in over a month and half because it wasn’t a “want to”. I found I was writing because I thought I “should” based on others’ opinions, expertise and beliefs so I decided to take a break for awhile to get clear for myself.
So what about you? Where do you need to stop the “should’s” in your life?
I invite you to explore the question as you create awareness around where you are run by “should’s”. Without judgment, decide what you need to do with that “should”.
Here’s a system I use called the “Three D” system that will help you choose:
- Dump it. If it’s not necessary or life giving do you really need to keep the should?
- Delegate it. Maybe this is something that you can hire out or you can get help from someone else?
- Defer it. Take a break from it. See what happens and decide when you want to pick it back up or if you even want to. This is what I did with the blog writing.
As for me, I’m not convinced that I’m ready to re-engage in blogging. I know I wanted to begin with this post as I continue to explore what blogging looks like for me. I am committed to staying connected to community in a way that is life giving and allows me to use my wisdom and inspiration creatively. I want to support a win-win and I’m not quite sure what that looks like, yet.
The key here is to focus not on “should’s” but on what you really want paying special attention to where you come alive. Choose powerfully to do those things that “light you up”, because this is the place you will be energized, filled up and on purpose as you give to others.
What do you think? Share your thoughts and comments at the blog.
Bottom line: Stop the Should’s! It could be the most life transforming decision you’ll ever make as you free more of authentic self to positively impact the world!
Oxygen therapy. What’s this you might ask? According to Wikipedia it’s the administration of oxygen as a medical intervention. In the case of this blog, it pertains to this question: “Could you use a breath of fresh air?”
Take a minute right now and breathe deeply. What do you notice?
Are you alive and energized?
Or are you exhausted?
No matter where you find yourself, I have an invitation. Will you take a break for at least one and maybe two hours and join me to experience some oxygen therapy as a way to refresh renew and refuel?
This Thursday, I’m facilitating a FREE group coaching call on the theme of Celebrating Life using the Compass Action System. This will be your opportunity to experience the power of community while leaving replenished and inspired. For more details about this offering Click Here or Contact Me. You can also visit my Compass coaching website or Compass rep page.
This coming Saturday, I have the awesome opportunity to be on “live” radio with my friend and coach colleague Laurie Hardie. I’ll be co-hosting with her on the Saturday morning radio show Coffee with the Coaches on Seattle 820AM or KGNW.com. Our theme for this call is the title of this blog “Oxygen Therapy: Could you use a breath of fresh air?” If you can’t make it, be sure to listen to the archived call after the fact.
Will you take an hour to invest in and “love” on you? Grant yourself permission to take a break as you connect with your spirit. I guarantee you’ll leave replenished and renewed, filled with love and joy that will make you a better woman, wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend and business owner.
“If you want a love message to be heard, it has got to be sent out.
To keep a lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.”
I am sure not to be the only one who experiences that whatever task I undertake or project I agree to, it consistently takes two to three times as long as I anticipate to accomplish my intended goal.
You think we would get smart enough to do better at time management by planning for these certain realities, accepting that it always takes longer. But no, instead we judge ourselves and compress life, not wanting to ‘drop a ball’ or say ‘no’ to anything.
Can we be happy even at these times? Expanding compassion and patience, not for the outer world or others, but for ourselves seems to be the key to happiness until we can adjust our perception of time and surrender to and trust in Divine Order.
It is important not to miss the simple wonders in our hurry to force life along. So today, amidst looming project due dates (I refuse to call them dead-lines) and having more on my plate than I have allowed time for, I choose to take the time to notice that the sun is out for the first time in days, delight that I heard my grandson giggle over the phone, and show gratitude for the simple wonders, big and small, that reconnect me to the perfection in mis-perfection today.
WHAT DO YOU PERCEIVE AS THE SEVEN WONDERS OF THE WORLD?
by Author Unknown
A group of students was asked to list what they thought were
the present ‘Seven Wonders of the World.’ Though there were
some disagreements, the following received the most votes:
1. Egypt’s Great Pyramids
2. Taj Mahal
3. Grand Canyon
4. Panama Canal
5. Empire State Building
6. St. Peter’s Basilica
7. China’s Great Wall
While gathering the votes, the teacher noticed that one quiet student hadn’t turned in her paper yet. So she asked the girl if she was having trouble with her list. The girl replied, ‘Yes, a little. I couldn’t quite make up my mind because there were so many.’
The teacher said, ‘Well, tell us what you have, and maybe we can help.’
The girl hesitated, then read, ‘I think the ‘Seven Wonders of the World’ are:
1. to see
2. to hear
3. to touch
4. to taste
5. to feel
6. to laugh
7. and to love.
The room was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop.
The things we overlook as simple and ordinary and that we take for granted are truly wondrous! Be grateful for simple things!
Special credit for this blog post goes to Rhonda Hall, founder of The Center for Happiness. Be sure to learn more about Rhonda and her work at www.driveyourselfhappy.com.