Archive for authenticity
Accepting Oneself Completely
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Just yesterday I posted to my Facebook wall about the importance of “taking care of you”. Because of the thoughtful responses and “likes”, I realized that this was a “hot topic” that we all need to be reminded of. It really boils down to this…it’s essential to accept oneself completely.This is the place of self-mastery where you will find true fulfillment and make a significant contribution to the lives of others.
Since it’s a recurring sentiment among all women and I’m working on the website for The Leadership Collaborative this week, I decided to leverage my community and have collaborated with Nacie Carson for this week’s blog post. Enjoy and please, do something good for yourself today!
“The most terrifying thing is accepting oneself completely.” – Carl Jung
Thanks to St. Valentine (and Hallmark), February is a month full of love, romance, big red hearts, and overly-priced chocolate. But for me, February is going to be as much about building out the relationship with myself as it is going to be about writing sonnets to my Charles (though I do plan to get a few of those in!).
Why? Because like all relationships, the one we have with ourselves requires constant work and attention.
How many of you have had a friendship or romantic relationship that somehow got to a dull, unconnected place? You know the feeling, like you suddenly have nothing in common with the person anymore or you don’t really know them. Often, we’ll blame it on them – “they’ve changed, they’re different now, they’re going through a phase.” But what we fail to understand is that while those things might be true, they are true for our side of the table as well. We are constantly evolving, just like everyone around us, although these change tend to happen in small, minute increments making them difficult to realize.
Have you ever gotten to this place with yourself? Where you felt disconnected from your core, or lacking enthusiasm and energy, or just a little Lost? Chances are, you’re at that place because that relationship with yourself hasn’t grown as you’ve changed.
I’ll be the first to admit that I haven’t given my relationship with myself the work or attention it needs to keep me confident, self-assured, or feeling an appropriate appreciation for my potential or personal power. Instead of being aware and honoring the changes I’ve made over the last five years, I feel like I’ve been hyper-critical and always focusing on the faults. In my quest to Live Uncommonly I tore a lot of my core down to get to the bottom of what drove my need to quit the Corporate world, but instead of rebuilding I’ve just dug deeper and deeper in a quest to know myself completely. And while I feel like I know much more about who I am, why I’m motivated to do some things instead of others, and how I operate, I feel like the relationship I have with myself is worse than it was five years ago. Ironically, I look at the person in the mirror and catalogue faults, and then wonder what happened to that super-sparkly person I used to be.
I am still that person. I am still Nacie Carson, and my mission for this month is to take a page from Carl Jung and focus my energies on “accepting myself completely.”
Reprinted with permission by Nacie Carson, writer and founder of The Life Uncommon.
So what about you? Where are you in accepting yourself completely? Take a step today to get to know you and let us know what you learn about your brilliant and beautiful self!
Photo Courtesy of Photoxpress © Lev Dolgatshjov
Presence
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Go, go, go. Buy, buy, buy. Do, do, do. The messages received during the Christmas season are usually counter to our true desires. I assert that most of us actually prefer the “presence” of someone being fully connected with us over the “presents” we open on Christmas day.
I struggle with “presence” on a daily basis. It takes conscious discipline to train my heart and mind to live from the inside-out rather than allowing everything outside of me to define and drive me.
How about you? Do you feel the tension between your desire for a peaceful and grounded life while you experience the scattered feeling from the external pressures and demands?
Life is short; this Christmas and New Year how about showing up with a full heart, alert, involved and engaged? This is what it means to be fully present. Just imagine what your experience will be when you connect with others and your to-do list from this place?
So here’s a question to consider: “What keeps you from living in the present?”
Here are three things that might be getting in your way and a solution on how you can bring yourself back to presence during the holidays and beyond:
1. Discontentment—you lose sight of focus and look inward too much focusing on what you don’t have vs. what you actually do have.
Solution—Take a look at all that you have in your life. Be grateful and consider using what you have to help others.
2. Regret—you focus on the sorrows of life and your challenges to a fault, keeping you stuck in the past or bitter, angry, immobilized or ineffective.
Solution—Embrace forgiveness. Learn from your sorrows and challenges and allow these to help you be filled with grace and compassion for yourself and others.
3. Future fears—you focus on what future challenges which might happen causing you to worry about things you can’t completely control.
Solution—Live with expectation and take a look the choices you make today which can impact your future in a positive way. Overcome future challenges by being engaged in the present right now.
I’m curious what you think? What solution will you try during the holidays to keep you present? Share your comments at the blog at www.shannonbruce.com. If you’d like more wisdom and insight on the topic be sure to read and sign up for our team newsletter.
This Christmas, I wish you true joy, quiet peace and perfect love. Enjoy the gift of presence.
“Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.”
Babatunde Olatunji
Picture Source © photographer Natalya Korolevskaya, www.photoxpress.com
Vulnerability = Power
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I am reminded that life can be a challenging teacher. In the past two weeks, another profound life lesson has shown me that vulnerability equals power.
The day after Thanksgiving, my daughter and I were in a car accident where she was hurt and our car was totaled. She’s doing very well in spite of all that she went through and thankfully we are getting through it together relying on our faith and the loving support of others. So while it has been painful on multiple levels there have many gems revealed that have changed the way we think, act and behave.
One gift is that I’ve been connected to another coach named Janet Frood who understands the power in vulnerability. In her provocative blog post on “Vulnerability = Power” she says, “Your vulnerability is the source of your greatest power. It’s also the access point for your life purpose.”
My life purpose continues to become clearer every day, especially with life as a teacher. One thing I continue to see over and again is that life purpose isn’t specifically about “what you do” it’s about “who you are”. True life purpose comes as a result of fully expressing who you are in all that you do and it’s an ongoing discovery process.
Many lessons have emerged from this “wake up” call. Here are just a few insights that will help you be vulnerable and become more powerful in your life and work:
- When you ask for help, you give other people permission to do the same. This fosters meaningful relationship and enhances the joy of interacting with others.
- As you sit in quiet reflection and experience the full range of emotions you heal more quickly. Emotions give you insight and wisdom. When you stuff them it takes longer to heal. When you express them, you tap into what will serve you to move forward as you identify what you need to let go of.
- You gain clarity of intention that leads to meaningful action that’s right for you. You now have clear filters for your life’s decisions. You can let go of “have to’s”, “ought to’s”, and “should’s” that keep you from being authentic and living purposeful.
What do you think? How has being vulnerable allowed you to tap into your own power and strength? Share your comments at www.shannonbruce.com and let us learn from your insight and wisdom.
Another gift of the car accident is that it’s helping me live into my most authentic life and vocation. If you want to learn more about the shifts happening, sign up for my monthly newsletter where you will have access to additional resources, insight and coaching services to support you.
Here’s to finding your power in the vulnerability. The discovery awaits you if you’re ready to journey.
Photo Courtesy of Photoxpress © Jeffrey Zalesny
Thanksgiving Leads to Thanks-Living
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On Monday night, areas of Western Washington State were hit by a major snow storm. In fact, 50,000 people remain without power and some won’t have it restored until Friday. The temperatures remain at or below freezing so this is a significant situation as we head into the Thanksgiving holiday.
With the snow and ice on the roads, I asked my Dad to be my chauffeur because I don’t do well in ice. I remember sliding down the ice on Queen Anne Hill in Seattle years ago and ever since then I have decided this is one area I have no expertise! Hence, the request of my father.
I left my daughter at my parents’ house and my Dad and I headed to mine. Along the way, we saw trees downed due to high winds up to 60 mph, police cars and tow trucks everywhere, flashes of lightning in the sky, cars in ditches and power outages creating an eerie landscape. Amidst the chaos, I was deeply grounded believing that there was something significant about to happen.
We came upon a downed tree and needed to turn around. As we crested a hill on our new route, we found a man who went up over the ditch with his car as he landed against the telephone pole. It had just happened moments earlier so we pulled over to ask if he was OK. He was shaken but with the exception of his damaged car, he was fine. We gave him a ride home and as we left him I could feel emotions stirring within me.
I knew I was experiencing a transformational moment. Something shifted deep within as I connected with my spirit. I realized that all of the work that I’ve been doing to launch The Leadership Collaborative came into crisper focus.
I made connections between my work and the noble cause I am passionate about. I’m still in process with it as I allow the evening adventures to continue to percolate in me.
This is all rather timely as I have been asking myself “Why?” and “For the sake of what?” to get clear on the impact I want to have in the lives of others through my business. Monday night’s adventures are helping me find my true answers which I am committed to gaining. I believe these core truths will help me create a sustainable life and business that will allow me to help the under privileged in a significant way.
All of this has brought me to a place of deep thanksgiving. Since that Monday night, I have acknowledged my gratitude in the following ways:
- being grateful for the gift of basic necessities and praying for those less fortunate,
- honoring this serving moment with my father by talking about it with him and allowing this to create a deeper connection between us,
- being thankful that as an entrepreneur, I have freedom and flexibility in my life to accommodate the unexpected situations that come up.
What about you? What are you grateful for this Thanksgiving?
From this experience, I recognize that Thanksgiving is more than a holiday. It’s a state of being that leads to thanks living, calling forth a shift of perspective that is aligning my thoughts, actions and behaviors to match the core of who I am authentically.
I’m curious what changes this post might inspire in your life? What will thanks living mean to you? I invite you to share your comments at the blog at www.shannonbruce.com.
As you engage with family and friends this Thanksgiving, share your gratitude with them. Let them know what matters and feel the shift within and around you as you express from this place of intimate authenticity. Carry this new perspective of thanks living with you beyond the weekend and watch the world transform.
Saying a prayer of Thanksgiving for the gift of your support and relationship.
May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
~Irish Blessing
Photo Courtesy of Photoxpress © .shock
Bloom Where you’re Planted in your Business
Posted by: | CommentsThis week’s blog post is one that I shared as a guest blogger on the topic of building an authentic and sustainable direct sales business. Julie Anne Jones and I have been friends and colleagues now for over 7 years and to support her while on vacation, I offered tips and insight below. Be sure to learn more about Julie Anne by visiting her website and read on for insight that will help you find internal peace and external impact whether you have a direct sales business, are a self-employed entrepreneur or a woman with a full life!
In my work as a professional certified coach, I’ve found that women in business often look outside of themselves to gain answers to their questions for their lives and businesses, which can be both a blessing and a curse.
You definitely want to gather best practices and insight from the experts who are proven successes in their field because you can learn great tips from them. This is the blessing of working with companies like Julie Anne Jones, Inc., who have resources, coaching, and training to help you and your teams grow to the next level of mastery and excellence.
At the same time, you can become too outward focused to the point where you lose sight of who you are and what you want to create. If you spend all of your time gathering information from the experts, you can become distracted, overwhelmed and lose your focus which can become a curse that diminishes your results in both your business and your life.
So what’s the answer? In my opinion, it’s about learning how to bloom where you are planted by going inward to discover the answers that live within. Once you have this insight, you can blend this knowledge with tips from the experts to catapult you to a flourishing business that is sustainable and prosperous beyond your wildest dreams.
So how do you get there?
As coaches, we use a tool called the Wheel of Life which helps you assess your level of fulfillment and satisfaction in eight different areas of life, ranging from career, fun, family and finances to your spirituality. After working with this tool for over 6 years, I began to realize it took my clients out of the heart and into the head, leading them to answers outside of themselves as they tried to “figure out” how to build prosperous businesses and balance their careers with the other areas of their lives. The end result was often overwhelm, frustration and lack luster results.
I now use a new tool called the Flower of Life to support my clients in creating thriving lives and prosperous businesses. As you’ll see by the image to the right, the center of the flower is your spirituality where the core essence of the authentic you lives. The center of this flower represents the heart of you which holds the answers to your unique values, identity, mission and purpose. With this inner wisdom, you can use these filters to make purposeful and intentional choices which produce improved results in all areas of your life as represented by the petals of the flower. Notice the impact will benefit your business, relationships and more.
The bottom line here is that knowing who you are at the core provides you with filters (i.e. your values, identity, mission and purpose) that will propel your direct sales business to a new level, allowing you to flourish in your work as you thrive in your life at the same time.
Now is the time to bloom where you’re planted. Begin today discovering who you are within so you can flourish personally and professionally during this fall selling season.
© Copyright 2010, Shannon Bruce
Shannon Bruce, PCC is a Mompreneur Success Coach, Trainer and Co-Author of the book “Direct Selling Power: Expert Advice to Accelerate your Business”. As a catalyst for life transformation, Shannon empowers self-employed women to break through their barriers to reconnect with what really matters, calling them forth to boldly go after their inspired life vision with courage, confidence and authenticity. For more information about Shannon and her work you can visit www.shannonbruce.com and www.yourgreaterpurpose.com. Receive a free audio download of Shannon’s Direct Selling Telesummit Training on her book chapter, “Ignite your Passion and Live with Purpose” when you e-mail shannon@shannonbruce.com.
